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Part VIII : Osho gives Discourses again after three
years’ silence
On 30th October 1984, Osho ends his three-year silence. Each
evening he gives a discourse to a small group of people, in his
own house. The discourses are video-taped and replayed in the
meditation hall the following evening for everyone. Before going
into silence, Osho had started a new phase to speak his own truth,
in place of commenting of earlier masters. Now he continues this
phase. He names these discourse series: The Rajneesh Bible
It is a little difficult for me to speak again. It has been difficult
always, because I have been trying to speak the unspeakable. Now
it is even more so. After one thousand, three hundred and fifteen
days of silence, it feels as if I am coming to you from a totally
different world. In fact it is so. The world of words, language,
concepts, and the world of silence are so diametrically opposite
to each other, they don't meet anywhere. They can't meet by their
very nature. Silence means a state of wordlessness; and to speak
now, it is as if to learn language again from ABC. But this is
not a new experience for me; it has happened before too.
For thirty years I have been speaking continually. It was such
a tension because my whole being was pulled towards silence, and
I was pulling myself towards words, language, concepts, philosophies.
There was no other way to convey, and I had a tremendously important
message to convey. There was no way to shirk the responsibility….
(Here Osho talks about his early work in India)
Now (by 1981) I have found my people and I have to arrange a
silent communion, which will help in two ways: those who cannot
understand silence will drop out. That will be good. That will
be a good weeding; otherwise they will go on clinging around me
because of the words, because their intellect feels satisfied.
And I am not here to satisfy their intellect. My purpose is far,
far deeper, of a different dimension.
So these days of silence have helped those who were just intellectually
curious, rationally interested in me, to turn their back. And
secondly, it has helped me to find my real, authentic people who
are not in need of words to be with me. They can be with me without
words. That's the difference between communication and communion.
Communication is through words, and communion is through silence.
So these days of silence have been immensely fruitful. Now only
those are left for whom my presence is enough, my being is enough,
for whom just the gesture of my hand is enough, for whom my eyes
are enough—for whom language is no more a need.
But today I have suddenly decided to speak again—again
after one thousand, three hundred and fifteen days—for the
simple reason that the picture that I have been painting all my
life needs a few touches here and there to complete it, because
that one day when I became silent everything was left incomplete.
Before I depart from you as far as my physical body is concerned,
I would like to complete it.
I have been speaking to Hindus, to Christians, to Jews, to Mohammedans,
to Jainas, to Buddhists, to Sikhs, to people belonging to almost
all the so-called religions. This is for the first time I am speaking
to my own people: not to Hindus, not to Mohammedans, not to Christians,
not to Jews. It makes a lot of difference, and only because of
that difference can I give the finishing touch to the picture
that I have been painting. What difference does it make? To you
I can speak directly, immediately. To the Hindus I had to speak
through Krishna, and I was not happy about it. But there was no
other way, it was a necessary evil. To Christians I could speak
only through Jesus. I was not at ease about it, but there was
no other way. So one has to choose the least evil. Let me explain
to you.
I do not agree with Jesus on all points. In fact, there are
many questions which I have left unanswered, because even to touch
them would have been destructive to those Christians who had come
to me. Now they are clean. People say that I am brainwashing people.
No, I am not brainwashing people. I am certainly washing their
brains—and I believe in dry cleaning. So I can say to you
now exactly what I feel; otherwise, it was a burden on me. unconc01
You ask: Have we failed You in any way, that You have to start
speaking again?
It is not because of your failing me that I have started speaking.
It has nothing to do with you. I am just a man who lives moment
to moment. One day I felt like going into silence. I went into
silence. Anybody in my place would not have gone into silence
that way because so much was incomplete, so many things had to
be done. But I couldn't care less. One day I will die, and things
will be incomplete—have I to postpone my death too?
I live life as I will live death, moment to moment.
If things are incomplete, let them be incomplete. Perhaps that
is their destiny. Perhaps somebody else will complete them. Who
am I to be bothered?
So one day I stopped, because I felt like it. And one day I started
speaking. I just told Sheela—that time also it was poor
Sheela—I told her, "I'm going to stop speaking."
She was shocked. What would happen to the whole movement? How
would the sannyasins survive? They had become so accustomed to
hearing me every day; it had become their nourishment, daily nourishment.
But I never consider anything, I am very inconsiderate. Whatsoever
I feel, I do, without thinking at all about the consequences.
I am ready to accept any consequence happily.
Again it was poor Sheela. I told her, "I am going to speak
today!"
She asked me, "But arrangements have to be made, and this
and that…. Can't it be tomorrow?"
I said, "No. That is your business—arrangements and
other things. I am going to speak today."
It has nothing to do with you. It is just my way of life, moment
to moment, remaining spontaneous, remaining unpredictable. Not
only to you or to the world at large—to myself I am unpredictable.
I don't know, tomorrow I may not speak, I may stop again. I cannot
guarantee about tomorrow because tomorrow is not in my hands,
it is open, undecided. We will see when it comes. We will see
what it brings. And I have lived this way my whole life. unconc23
Somebody has asked if people are sending me jokes the way they
used to in Poona. They started sending jokes. I said no, because
now I don't need jokes. I needed jokes at that time because it
was an entertainment. It is no longer entertainment. Just by the
way, if a joke comes on its own I am not averse to it. But now
I want to speak spontaneously, directly, immediately, the simple
truth that is mine.
That's why the lectures have become so long, because to talk on
others was tedious for me, to tell you the truth. I managed to
tolerate sixty minutes, seventy minutes, at the most ninety minutes.
With more than that it was possible I may have forgotten on whom
I was speaking! I had to keep questions and notes in front of
me so I could remember that this was a Zen series, that this was
a Sufi series, that this was a Hassid series—and I didn't
get mixed up. Teertha was reading the story and I kept another
copy with myself so I didn't forget the story and get lost, because
I could have easily moved in any direction.
Now there is no problem. I don't have to remember anybody, I can
simply say whatever comes; hence the lecture has become too long.
And people have enquired as to why sometimes I finish abruptly—I
never used to do that. That is true. When I was just entertaining
you I gave the right beginning, gave the right middle and gave
the right end; rounded, complete. But right now it is all raw,
uncut—unpolished diamonds from the mine itself.
So there is no beginning in fact, and there is no end. Abruptly,
I start. Not to shock you I have persuaded Sheela to begin with
a question, just to give you the feel that…. Otherwise if
I begin speaking abruptly you will think I have gone completely
out of my mind! Nobody is asking and I am answering!
But that's actually the case: nobody is asking the questions,
most of the questions I have to tell Sheela to write down. They
are not somebody else's. So poor Sheela has to write down a question,
then ask it; and because it is my own question I don't need to
keep it in front of me. And I am free to move in any way. Abruptly
I am starting, and abruptly I am stopping—that's truly existential!
Beginnings are abrupt. If you look closely existence is abrupt,
sudden—and I want these discourses to be existential. Yes,
I will be stopping anywhere I feel to stop; there is no other
consideration. You can see now clearly why I had to use religious
language, and why now I am continually telling you to flush God
down the toilet, to forget all about heaven and hell, and that
the law of karma is nothing but boo-boo.
And I am no longer showing any respect to Jesus, or Buddha, Mahavira,
Krishna. I am just treating them as a headmaster treats his children.
If they behave rightly then they will not be punished, that's
all. If they don't behave rightly, then I am going to give them
real hits that they will never forget.
Now I have no need for any camouflage.
I can stand fully naked, as I am, open to you.
There is no desire anywhere in me to say a single word that I
cannot authenticate on my own authority. person14
I have found the people who are enough for my work to spread
worldwide.
That's why I want to complete the circle. Now I want to say things
which I wanted to say in the beginning but which were difficult
to say because nobody was ready to listen.
Now I have my people—whose hearts are open to absorb me,
to take me in.
And before I depart from the body, I would like to pour all that
I have in you.
It is almost like lighting one candle by another candle.
You can go on lighting one candle by another candle:
Millions of candles you can light.
The first candle does not lose anything, remember. It is not that
it has lost so much light because now one million candles are
burning. No, it has not lost anything, it has gained.
It was a lonely candle in a dark world. Now, millions of candles
are showering their light all over the space.
Their light is the same.
Their flames are different.
Each sannyasin has to be a flame unto himself
But the light of all the sannyasins will be the same:
The light that I want to be spread all over the earth—because
that is the only hope. Without it humanity cannot last more than
fifteen years. But if we can create the light I am talking about,
if we can make this whole world afire—and we can….
I started the journey alone. People went on coming and joining
me; now there are thousands of sannyasins. And do you see?—I
have not been very long on the road, just twenty-five years. And
the difficulties that I have been facing you will not be facing.
The problems that I had to face, you will not be facing. One day,
alone, I started. Now my candle is burning in thousands of candles.
Each candle has the same potential:
It can light up millions of candles.
In the coming fifteen years everything will become intense.
The danger will become intense.
The challenge will become intense.
The possibility of ultimate destruction will become intense.
And the possibility of ultimate transformation will become intense.
In these fifteen years everything is going to take the intense-most
form possible because a planet that has been working for millions
of years to create human consciousness has come to a space where
either death or total transformation will be the only alternatives.
Old religions are just dead. They don't give any option; they
are dying with the dying society, and there is nobody except you.
You should understand the gravity, the significance, the responsibility.
There is nobody on the whole earth like you, nobody who has dropped
all rubbish that is old and who is ready to become a new kind
of man. Don't be worried that you are such a small minority.
The day I started I was alone. Even at that time I did not think
that I was a minority, because truth is never a minority.
Truth is always the whole—not even the majority but the
whole, one hundred percent….
A single sannyasin—even a single sannyasin—is not
a minority, because the truth that burns in him and the light
that he holds in his hands, the torch that he holds in his hand,
is enough to create the whole face of the earth.
And it is going to happen—and not with God's help, because
God's help has been coming for thousands of years and you see
what has happened.
This time, without God—at least give it a try this time
without God, without heaven, without hell, without all that crap!
Just give a chance to pure humanity, to the ordinary, natural
human being.
And I say to you it is going to happen—no God can prevent
it. person14
It is time we burned the whole of history and started from the
very beginning, fresh.
That's my whole work with you.
Talking to you I am really trying to burn your conditionings,
trying to remove all the rubbish that you have been carrying your
whole life…just trying to clean you and make you utterly
blank so that you can start sprouting your self—otherwise
you are so full of junk that there is no space for your self.
dark28
Vivek was just asking me, "Why are your discourses called
`The Rajneesh Bible'?"
They are called "The Bible" just to make it clear to
the whole world the "bible" simply means the book, it
does not mean the holy book. That's why you say "bibliography".
Is there anything holy in a bibliography? A bibliography simply
means a list of books. It is really just "the book",
and I want it to be clear to the whole world that a bible has
nothing to do with holiness.
I am not a holy man because to me the word "holy" seems
so phony, so bogus that I would prefer just to be a human being.
Just to be a human being is so grand, so great; there is nothing
greater than that. But strangely, man has been trying to become
God. Rather than trying to become man he had been trying to become
God. God he cannot become because there is no God, and nothing
like God is possible.
But in making the effort to become God and trying hard to rise
higher, he falls, is bound to fall. And when he falls, he falls
below the human being. That's where all your religious people
have fallen, your so-called holy men and saints and sages. Trying
to become God they have fallen even from being human beings, they
have become subhuman.
Our effort is just to be alive human beings.
This is our religion. dark13
What you are saying now is quite different from what you were
saying a few years ago…
I am a man of contradictions, and I am proud of it! Only an idiot
is always consistent. The intelligent person goes on growing,
finding new ground, new spaces. And when I go on finding new groovy
spaces, naturally I have to talk about them. And if they contradict
my past, so what? Past is dead anyway. last113
I am always contradicting myself knowingly, so that nobody can
make a consistent philosophy out of me.
Those contradictions, if you pass through all of them, first will
create confusion in you; second, will create a tremendous silence
in you. If you persist, if you don't escape from the confusion,
they will create a silence in you—and that silence will
be a revelation. So I am not giving a philosophy to people; I
am giving a device for them to discover the ultimate silence of
existence—which is meaningless, as meaningless as a roseflower
is. last130
You have said that all your words of the past are not important.
So what are all your books for?
Jesus! I have never said that my books of the past are not important!
But you may have heard that. What I had said is that to me truth
is not something unchanging. Anything unchanging is dead.
Truth is alive, breathing, moving. So when I am saying something
to you now, don't be bothered about the past—what I said
twenty years before. And I say to you, if I am still here tomorrow,
the truth will have become more potent, deeper, higher. My books
of the past are not unimportant….
Whatever I have said in these thirty years—and I have been
speaking continuously, except for those few years when I was silent—every
single word is important, because they are all interconnected.
You may find contradictions, you may find inconsistencies. Don't
be afraid; life is full of contradictions, full of inconsistencies.
And I don't know any other god than life itself.
I have never said that my books of the past are not important.
But this goes on happening: I say one thing, you hear something
else. I have said only that what I am saying now is the highest
flower on the that I have been growing for thirty years. So if
you have to decide, decide on this moment's statement, and don't
be bothered about inconsistencies, contradictions.
And I have also said, remember this for tomorrow also. Tomorrow
this day will be old, gone. Newer flowers will be blossoming.
Be always in the present, and you will be always right. And don't
be afraid when tomorrow you find an even better thing. Then don't
cling to the yesterday. It was beautiful, but it was beautiful
yesterday….
I don't say anything considering you, I say it because it is
true! If it hurts you, I am helpless. If it does not suit you,
disturbs you, it is your problem; I have nothing to do with it.
My concern is to remain flowing with existence, life, truth. And
whatever existence wants to speak through me, I will speak.
I never hesitate to contradict myself, because who am I to interfere?
It was a life force that said that, the same life force is saying
this. There must be some inner connection which you cannot see.
My books of the past are important, because they will be a test
for you—whether you can grow with me or you have stopped
long ago….
It is difficult to be with a living message, because the message
goes on moving in tune with existence. It does not bother about
you. You have to keep yourself running with the message, you have
to forget all about what was said in the past. The new, the latest,
is always the right. And it does not mean that what has preceded
it was not important. Without it this new phenomenon would not
have been there at all.
In my thirty years' life of talking from my heart to people, thousands
have come and gone. They still love me, but only up to the point
when they departed. After that they say, "Something has gone
wrong."…
People, thousands of people, have walked along with me, but
they go only so far and stop. They were not coming along with
me; they were really finding nourishment for their own rubbish,
knowledge. The moment they found that I was saying something that
went against their knowledge, their religion, their party line,
their ideology, they stopped. They departed.
If you ask them, they will say, "Yes, there was a time
when Osho was right. He is no longer right." But this is
natural. Only a person who has immense capacity to change, to
go on and on, can find the truth of life. And once you have found
it there is no way to lose it, because you find it in the very
innermost being of yourself. You are it! How can you drop it somewhere?
How can you forget about it?
But the disciple who stops at a certain point certainly has
to console himself, that "Up to this point Osho was right.
After that, he has gone wrong." He does not know that right
is not a static thing, it is a growing phenomenon….
With me you will find it difficult—until I die. And don't
hope that I am going to die soon. I am going to disturb you as
much as possible. If you can manage to live with a living message,
and if you have the guts to go on changing with the living message,
you are blessed. Many will come around me, but only a few will
remain. Yes, after my death many more will come, and everybody
will remain!…
You are asking me, that I have said that my old books are not
important…. You want to divide me in two parts—my
old books, and my present message to you—so that you can
choose. I will not allow you such a convenient way.
My old books are immensely important. Unless you understand
them, you will not be able to understand me. But remember, it
is a constant flow and change, so don't be bothered with inconsistencies,
contradictions.
If you go on, soon you will be able to find the truth. And once
the truth is revealed, all contradictions and inconsistencies
dissolve. Then you can see, crystal-clear, that it is a single
message from the roots to the flower. It is a single organism.
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